I look at love a little bit differently now.
With a bit more awe and wonder.
And with a bit more soberness.
It exists. And it costs us something.
And in the spending, we learn to love.
And yes, this is seemingly the goal.
The most pressing thing I want to mention, is of course this landscape of relationships. How men and women interact and how we, in the midst of our insecurities and failures find the very soul that looks us in our eyes and endeavors to understand us and embrace the mystery.
Love.
It doesn’t need to be so complicated.
But again, I find myself looking with side eyes at some of those romantic relationships around me, like, “Hmm, I don’t believe you. “
I don’t believe the narrative that you are projecting is actually the narrative you are living.
Love.
It doesn’t need to be so complicated.
Arguments will come.
There are disagreements to be had.
But yo, how do you ‘speak now or forever hold your peace’ to your own heart.
How do you throw a flag on that play?
Something’s amiss.
But instead, we’ll choose to be a coward and lie to ourselves, when we already know the truth.
Love is held by the courageous.
Wait, let me go back a beat.
I relate to being a coward. I’ve been there many times. I’d convinced myself that I had to grab the one in front of me for fear there would never be another person like him on the planet.
Which is partially true. He holds his own fingerprints.
But he didn’t fit in my heart.
It’s taken a proper year to realize and accept that.
But meanwhile, as I’ve let go of what seemed to be my long lost awaited promise, more questions would arise.
And more marriages would happen around me.
And more love would begin to bloom.
And of course, I hear more comments like, “Whaaat, you want to wait until you’re in your 30s until you get married and have babies?? I never want to have to wait that long…when I’m that old….”
And I start to question everything.
Or at least those things that are still questionable at my age and at this stage of the game.
Not my worth but rather my answers.
But real talk, I can’t help but think love is still so much more steadfast than what I had first imagined.
And there’s no need to lie to myself.
My resolve is sure.
Love.
For you and for me, it won’t be so complicated.
But indeed, rather likeable and unshakeable.
Wisdom’s knocking:
“Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.”