New Hope

     The finishing of 2014 was HARD.

     I don't know how it was for some of you, but I "labored" my way through until December 31st.

     My emotions were all out of wack, I seemed to have a bit of brain fog, and I had no idea how I was going to make the finish line regarding promises yet to unfold.

     But somehow I knew...

     Somehow I knew, if we could make it to 2015, there would be a victory, a turnaround, a rest, and the beginning of a fulfillment of things we've waited for.

     I can't fully explain how I knew this, but it's just one of those downloads I got during my many tear-filled prayer times with God in December.

     As we take intentional and unknown steps into 2015, I wanted to encourage your heart.

     Your choices matters. Your thoughts matters. And as you know, your thoughts form your actions, your actions habits, and your habits become your character.

     I realized the pressing, the pushing, and the tension I had been feeling the latter half of 2014 had a lot to do with getting me out of my comfort zone and ready for the next big phase of my life, and not so much a marker of punishment for doing something wrong or off kilter.

     Right living has its very real and true rewards.

     Often times, one feels like a sucka for waiting and choosing the "narrow" way.

     And many times, the narrow way can feel suffocating and almost, downright painful.

     But let me repeat, right living has its very real and true rewards. Just you wait and see.

     And if you just read that last sentence feeling a little nervous and guilty-- DON'T.

     There's no need for you to feel guilty Beloved, right now, this very moment has become your tender mercies, your fresh start. So let it be.

    Just humble yourself. Make that declaration before God and then prepare to listen to what He wants to tell you next. And seek out people that are faithfully grounded. Those you trust, admire, and actually want to be around.

     Okay. I'm not quite sure why I went down that little rabbit trail, but I'm sure that was for someone.

     But back to my "labor".

     God has been birthing a new level of faith in me. 

     To believe beyond the dream of dreams for you and I. Even in the midst of waiting for other dreams to manifest.

     There is rest coming to our hearts this year. It is a part of the promise that God is fulfilling in our hearts.

     I still believe that God is good, that He is kind, and that He is faithful.

     So much so, that I chose, as an act of my will to celebrate the coming of 2015 with a bang. Because I felt this year in particular was going to be indicative of celebration.

     Normally, my idea of a New Year's Eve celebration would involve pajamas, brownies, tears, and Carson Daly in Times Square.

     But this year, I celebrated in an intentional way with two specific friends. Friends of mine that have prayed and believed with me for their own promises as well as my own.

     It was a declaration of sorts.

     And now, here we are.

     It is 2015.

     My heart is full of expectation and new hope.

     What does it look like to "Hope against hope"?

     It looks like 2015.

     The facts would say, "Patrice, you're getting older and your chances of meeting a quality "king" of sorts is near impossible. Your original hope of meeting someone in your 20s is now over...and the ministry plans and career plans you have will simply have to continue solo..."

     But the miracle of "Hope against hope" would say, "Patrice, you will meet your boo-king at just the right time. He will know. And you will know. And it will be as though no time was ever lost. And the two of you will continue God's love legacy in a powerful way, speaking redemption and hope over those still in the battle and in the wait.

     Because God is so good, kind, and faithful, even in the midst of impossibilities."

Wisdom's Knocking:

Therefore, the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace 

and may be guaranteed to all Abraham’s offspring—not only to those who are of the law 

but also to those who have the faith of Abraham. He is the father of us all. 

As it is written: “I have made you a father of many nations.” 

He is our father in the sight of God, in whom he believed—

the God who gives life to the dead and calls into being things that were not.

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed 

and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, 

“So shall your offspring be.” Without weakening in his faith, 

he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—

since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah’s womb was also dead. 

Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, 

but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, 

being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. 

This is why “it was credited to him as righteousness.” 

The words “it was credited to him” were written not for him alone, but also for us, 

to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead. He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.

-Romans 4:16-25

When You Know What's Coming

     

     In light of the events happening in our nation today, I wanted to be sensitive to this moment in history.

     To be honest, I was unaware of the lingering and monumental tension that had been rising since August of this year regarding Michael Brown. It was a story and a life that garnered a great deal of attention this past summer, but had become overshadowed by new media stories about politics, blizzards, and celebrity on-goings.

     Yes, I had been unaware, yet not fully ignorant. Something within me poised me in front of my living room TV last night around 9PM.  Upon turning my television on, I turned to a local channel. And already there was a "Special Report".

     I knew what I was in for.

     Before anything was set in stone from the man giving his detailed written speech regarding this special case, I already began to gently weep.

     "This doesn't feel right..."

     And then in the haze of the speech, as if brushed over like a comma or an incidental pause, the fate of a nation's true unrest was now given reason to manifest.

     And now there are so many opinions, but mostly broken hearts and severed spirits.

     But as heavy and thick as this all is, to my own surprise, I am not surprised that this tension has erupted and manifested in our country. Most already knew it was coming.

     As a Black woman, I may seem less of a threat to certain authority figures, and it's true, I have not experienced the type of racism my father has or my brothers have being male and being Black.

     But instead of becoming embittered and jaded by the plethora of newsfeeds out there, I'm simply forced to ask myself, what is the 'Higher Way' in all of this? What is the more Excellent Way?

     These ways don't just start with the broad overview of life and appear only at protests, but instead come to hit us at the ground level. The small choices we make on a daily, which then in turn lead to the bigger picture.

     Many people are frustrated trying to understand (or not understand) the place of injustice in all of this.

     But just picture yourself going through your own daily injustices. How do we react?

     When someone cuts us off on the highway, when someone lies about your character, when someone cheats you out of money. Frustration ensues to the say the least.

     But now imagine the stakes are a bit higher, someone hurt your mother, your father, or your child.

     Injustice is such a fiery tool and instigator.

     But yet, we as Believers are called to a more excellent way, because a more excellent way was extended to us in love, while we were boldly against or indifferent to such a love from God pursuing us.

     This excellent way doesn't leave us a decorative doormats, but instead gives us wisdom for the season (how to move forward in love, compassion, and forgiveness while being intentional for positive change) and gives ultimate jurisdiction--the final word to God.

     It may seem crazy to you, but I've personally seen the justice of God rise up on my behalf throughout my life. Therefore, the ability to believe that God is about justice and dispenses it in due time is not hard for me to believe at all.

     The end of this story is not in the unrest, but in the healing that is meant to come to this nation.

     Moreover, it's interesting to me, a friend of mine is in the movie, "Selma", which is set to open this year on Christmas Day.

     The process of this film has been years in the making, and we all didn't quite understand the many delays it encountered year after year.

     None of us really knew what the cultural climate would be when this film would finally premiere.

     And alas, here we are, needing a voice of hope, a voice of promise, a voice a triumph from heaven to once again speak identity over this unique nation with such a tumultuous and rich legacy.

     With that said, I've watched this "Selma" trailer several times:

     Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6t7vVTxaic


     And it has become clear to me, this movie was never just about being a biopic about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., but it is also meant to remind us all, of who we could be, and who we are meant to be even in the midst of heartbreak, injustice, and hope deferred.      

Wisdom's Knocking:

"Do not let yourself be overcome by evil, but overcome (master) evil with good."

- Romans 12:21

Hey Gigi, "He's Just Not That Into You"

Alex & Gigi

     It felt like a little bit of a throwback. I mean, once a movie plays on TV, it's officially a throwback, right?

     And especially since "Myspace" is the main social media talked about in the movie. I mean, once seen as the social media Promised Land, Myspace is now the Reno 911 of the internets. It's still functioning, it's just a few beats off and feels a little bit dirty.

     I had this sense that I somehow just saw the 2009 film, "He's Just Not that Into You", and at the same time, it felt like decades have gone by since I last saw this movie.

     I think I know why. There's something about this movie that often hits a little too close to home. Which causes me to want to distance myself from it. Like..."Yep. That's what we do as females." We read every little minuscule inflection and glance that you guys give us as some sort of build up to..."I love you and I can't live my life without you."

    But I also love this movie, because it tells the truth. And by looking at the movie's current IMDb rating, not many folks appreciated that half-happy ending. But life is like that. Love mixed with pain, mixed with truth.

     If you haven't read the book or seen the movie, here's the long and short of it (Don't worry, there aren't any spoilers):

     "Ten people in Baltimore deal with their respective romantic problems, usually thwarted by the differing ideals and desires of their chosen partner. At the center of this is Gigi , a young woman who repeatedly misinterprets the behavior of her romantic partners...Gigi is a single woman who repeatedly misreads mundane actions and comments from her dates as indications they are romantically interested in her. She then frets when the guy doesn't call."

     Let's repeat: "...Who repeatedly misreads mundane actions and comments from her [guy friends] as indications they are romantically interested in her." For the rest of this blog post, you can just call me Gigi.

     I think we all feel like Gigi at some point in our lives. Whether you're a guy or a girl. We're always trying to interpret signals. Trying to understand one another, trying to find a connection.

     But I love what Alex says in the movie:

     "If a guy wants to be with a girl, he will make it happen, no matter what."

     Simple and true. I cannot tell you how many guys I've seen trip over themselves to get a girl's number. Especially if they think they'll never see that girl again. Doesn't matter if they're at a bar, at church, at work, at the game, at your mama's house. The Hunter gene kicks in, and all of a sudden, they become incredibly intentional.

     I tried exercising the Huntress gene. That use to be my M.O. And I know some guys like that. But if I already feel like I can dominate and control you in some way, you as a guy, have already failed me. You're probably the kindest and most handsome guy on the planet, but if you need me to approach you before you'll pursue me, sorry guy, you're not gonna be strong enough for me in the end. So let's just cut our losses now and be........friends.

     So needless to say, I'll be intentional....about letting my guy pursue me.

    I know. It's a fine balance between not making me feel hunted, but hunting me. Making me feel safe, but still promising me adventure. But not impossible. And the guy's reward for working so hard? If the chemistry is there between us. I'll match his efforts with my passion, my time and my attention...

So these are some of my favorite lines from the movie:

Mary: I had this guy leave me a voice mail at work so I called him at home and then he e-mailed me to my Blackberry and so I texted to his cell and then he e-mailed me to my home account and the whole thing just got out of control. And I miss the days when you had one phone number and one answering machine and that one answering machine has one cassette tape and that one cassette tape either had a message from a guy or it didn't. And now you just have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by seven different technologies. It's exhausting.

...  

Beth: I just need you to stop being nice to me unless you're gonna marry me.

... 

Gigi: We are all programmed to believe that if a guy acts like a total jerk that means he likes you.   

...

Gigi: Maybe his grandma died or maybe he lost my number or is out of town or got hit by a cab...
Alex: Or maybe he is not interested in seeing you again.

... 

Alex: So trust me when I say if a guy is treating you like he doesn't give a sh*t, he genuinely doesn't give a sh*t. No exceptions.

... 

Gigi: So what now I'm just supposed to turn from every guy who doesn't like me?
Alex: Uh. Yeah!
Gigi: There's not gonna be anybody left.

...

Alex: If a guy doesn't call you, he doesn't want to call you.

... 

Gigi: I may dissect each little thing and put myself out there so much but at least that means that I still care. Oh! You've think you won because women are expendable to you. You may not get hurt or make an ass of yourself that way but you don't fall in love that way either. You have not won. You're alone. I may do a lot of stupid sh*t but I'm still a lot closer to love than you are.

...

Gigi: ...But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is... just... moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.

 -----

     In short, I literally cried my eyes out at the end of this movie. For a variety of reasons.

     Let that sink in. I cried.

     Sometimes it feels good to realize the truth. And sometimes it's a bit painful to realize the truth. And I cried.

     I'm pretty good at it. Crying. For those of you that don't know me very well, don't worry, I laugh a great deal.


     So what do you think of the tagline for this movie: "Are you the exception...or the rule?" Ooooo. I know. A bit intriguing, like a proper tagline should be.

     But seriously. Are you the exception, or the rule? Am I the exception or the rule?

     I think we both know the answer to that.

Wisdom's Knocking:

"You are terrifying and strange and beautiful,
Something not everyone knows how to love."

-Warsan Shire

Credit: Wikipedia, IMDb
Photo Credit: Darren Michaels